Peaceful Solutions for Hitting and Anger

I came across this lovely little post from Simple Kids entitled 6 Peaceful Solutions for Hitting and Anger. I think Megan at Simple Kids had a some great ideas to start with.

I wanted to add a few more:

To diffuse the situation:

7. Turn on some playful or calming music while you use that Time-In-with-mom approach

8. Use texture activities like play-doh, clay, silly putty or theraputty, to help calm the child down.

9. Suggest other sensory calming activities like water play or sand play.

10. Offering Choices when having to share such as:

  • Say Please
  • Share
  • Play Together
  • Wait and Take Turns
  • Trade
  • Use a Timer

You can get picture cards at the Center on Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning to illustrate the above concepts, scroll down to Solution Kit Cue Cards.

An idea to try to prevent anger responses:
11. Make sure the child is not hungry.

Sometimes, anger can be caused from a drop in blood sugar, and little kids tend to burn off their energy stores quickly, so a good way to head off outbursts is by ensuring that the child has protein and complex carbohydrate with their meals and snacks.

I have found that my middle child can go from Dr. Jekyll back into Ms. Hyde when she gets a snack with protein in it (crackers with real cheese, apples or carrots and peanut butter, homemade fruit and yogurt smoothie).

Techniques to use when the child is not at the moment angry (those aren’t teachable moments).

12. Using books to teach about emotions – one of my favorites is Mad isn’t Bad (note that there’s a reference to God in the book).

Hands are not for Hitting is a good one for the younger children. They also have Teeth are Not for Biting and Feet are not for Kicking and Tails are not for Pulling.

13. Employ body movement activities like Yoga and Ballet to help with self-regulation

Two dvds you can get for home are

Baby Ballet – I found this one at Borders bookstore
YogaKids Fun Collection – I found this two disc set about Yoga ABC’s and From Silly to Calm at Target.

14. For more ideas check out my Kids’ Problem Solving Binder, for picture stories and links to make your own problem solving binder.

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10 Responses to Peaceful Solutions for Hitting and Anger

  1. Mika says:

    I love this post. Thanks for the constructive ideas.

  2. growinginpeace says:

    You’re welcome Mika!

    I know a lot about emotional regulation issues, but the good news is that you can help the child through their big emotions!

  3. This is a nice post and also I found the problem solving binder post very interesting. My son has a very low frustration level and I have been looking for ways to help him. Thanks for some good ideas and resources.

  4. growinginpeace says:

    Mom and Kiddo –

    I hope some of the resources I’ve listed help your son. I know all about low tolerance for frustrations too.

  5. I second number 11!
    My daughter acts like a different person when she is hungry. She gets hateful and destructive. A protein-filled snack makes all the difference in the world.

  6. growinginpeace says:

    Starr –

    Come to think of it, I’M more than a little cranky when I don’t get enough protein too!

  7. This is EXCELLENT! Thank you so much for writing these up. I am so sorry I am just now getting to this. I have fallen way behind on comment responses. These are so practical and helpful.

  8. growinginpeace says:

    Megan – No worries about not replying sooner. I know how time slips away.

    I’m glad you like these tips. Thanks for giving me the inspiration to write this post in the first place!

  9. Natalie says:

    I am finally getting to read the last 15 entries on your blog stuck in my reader. Those are all great ideas. In our case we don’t deal with anger, but with high anxiety. I also noticed that Anna is significantly calmer when she is well fed – your snack ideas are great. I am going to try YogaKids DVDs with her once we return from our vacations.

  10. growinginpeace says:

    Dd2 is my child with high anxiety – she’s the one who is overcoming her selective mutism. She had a great first day of school yesterday. I should make a follow up post of tips to handle anxiety.

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